I got the I love you but am not in love with you anymore. After 21 years together she emphatically said that she doesn't want our marriage anymore. Wants us to definitively separate. So now, I have a decision to make, begin living separate lives in the same home or just get my affairs in order and leave.
Its like an awful script for them and a horrible reaction for the LBS. We all follow these patterns.
Originally Posted by Mar252
I love my W with all of my heart and soul but I am done begging her to love me back. I really don't think the consequences of her actions are going to hit her unless I leave. I think she will feel it most acutely during the holidays.
She may and please be prepared that she may not. You want the consequences to hit her... many of us want justice and the WW to come to their senses. Please just make sure the thinking doesnt take you down the dark path of vengence
Originally Posted by Mar252
To all the LBS, if you had the option to stay or go when you first had your BD's what would you have done? I am open to all advice and opinions.
I've heard it both ways. Those that got the BD and had their spouse leave instantly thought it was god awful and wanted more time. Those that had more time and lived together like myself have the god awful IHS and the lovely time of watching your relationship die and your own love wither. I personally think my best chance for my M wouldve been to move out or move on right away but I have zero way to determine that. Living in the same house and talking about D and separating stuff then sitting together for dinner and playing with the kids together hurts like sitting 4 inches away from a fire. M have healed both ways and many have ended. That leaves us with....what is best for you?
Last edited by Core; 10/04/2003:56 PM.
H37, W37 D4, S2 ILYBNILWY 9/19 BD 9/19 EA discovered 10/19 Currently in limbo, no D or S process initiated
