May, firstly, can I just say what a catch you are? You are wise, self-reflective, smart, kind, inclusive and so loving. I feel lucky for your love and support and we don’t even know each other IRL. Your real-life people are so fortunate to have you in their life, whether it is friends or your children and especially your H. So keep walking forth with the knowledge that you are amazing and deserving of the best that life has to offer. Whether you meditate or do more yoga or tell mutual friend about your sitch, whether you change or just stay in the exact same spot for a long time, you are still worthy of the best.
I hope that your decision to keep your situation under wraps doesn’t inhibit your ability to get the support you need. Only you know what damage it could do, so I completely trust your intuition here. And I know that H’s behavior and your decision to stay at the moment has a certain societally-constructed reflection on you that you may be avoiding, but in the vein of you supporting H vs supporting yourself, it is something worth examining.
In the meantime, you are on the right path: examining where you stand on your lines in the sand, reflecting on what serves you best in the current moment and focusing on yourself. You go, girl.
