Mar, Your counselor sounds so much like mine. The T and my W both stated my anxiety was the main problem. Now yes it certainly was a problem and it was MY main problem but it wasnt the only one. If I fixed the anxiety or if you didn't have any in the first place, we don't know if things would be any different. The focus shifted to me every session. I left unheard and W left validated and progressively worse.
We know your pain all to well. I'm almost a year in and couldn't sleep last night as well. First night in awhile though. You'll hear 100 times that it gets better. It does, really slowly. Exercise was huge for me, along with IC, CBD oil, these forums and a couple close contacts. The same may help you as well. To say this is hard is an understatement. Your W had the opportunity to slowly disengage from the M while you got hit all at once.
The hard truth and one many of us still face whether reconciled or not, is lack of accountability in the WW/WAS. A heart felt apology, acknowledgement would feel wonderful. We often won't see it.
You'll get through this. Keep coming to the board as you need it.
H37, W37 D4, S2 ILYBNILWY 9/19 BD 9/19 EA discovered 10/19 Currently in limbo, no D or S process initiated
