WAW w/Exit Affair or WW? - Don't Want Divorce (2)

[Core]

Hey BL,

I'm behind on your sitch but wanted to chime in on recent events.

The VM from GIL is peculiar. I would think she's heard some awful things about you during this process and is trusting her family that all is true. Documenting this was helpful. It's awful and it does sound best to keep distance from her until some time passes. Especially while Ding to keep it low conflict. Sorry you are losing not just W but the in laws that you've bonded with.

With how much your W was in to "Mr Perfect", its shocking there could be OM2 but I'm not surprised after reading the boards. OM2 may be someone she's lining up to take OM1s place if it dont work out. After all, how can she trust a cheater. Being around your kids is another thing. What Ovr mentioned comes to mind....you control what you can. In the divorce you can mention you dont want the kids introduced to a new person for a set amount of time however my understanding is no one enforces it. I feel your pain on this one. What you can do is work on yourself. You're likely clouded with feelings about his character. I would be too. As an outsider, he sounds to me like an already divorced guys guy, not looking for commitment. Gosh, I may be a guy living at my dads, going to strip clubs after this dry spell.

No one will replace you as dad unless you let them. You'll always be dad to the kids. I equally am disgusted at the thought of someone else raising my kids. Something that helped and hurt me is the likelihood of anyone sticking around for awhile is slim. I dont know whats worse, multiple step dads, or one that stays. Ideally none but thats where you come in...create stability for those kids.