It is great that he did it. If I were you (knowing my advice may not be the best!!) I wouldn't worry so much how he did it. I have spent a lot of time there, focusing on what all the books say, it needing to be done the right way, blah blah blah. Lots of angst about letting H do it "his way" and not the right way. in the end I think there was definitely truth to H's feeling that I was trying to control the situation by dictating how it should be done. And, it is just one small step on a long journey and he'll have to keep to it-- all outside of your control.
So, maybe just let it go. Let him take ownership. Even if it wasn't the way you would have wanted it to happen-- at this point, it is done, so maybe just stop worrying about it and focus on the present. It will take some time before you feel safe again, is my guess.
((POMMY))
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
