Mumin, CW, may ~ Thanks for the feedback. It echoes what I learned in a co-parenting class I took in the winter.
I've been told it typically takes *minimum* 12-18 months post-finalization before things settle down in these high-conflict situations. I'm not holding my breath. I suspect it will be longer.
Mostly I'm frustrated with the impact on my kids. I didn't want the D for them either, but it has had a silver lining. My relationship with the kids is stronger than before. Even had we R'd, my X always had an element of needing to control how we parent, what the kids do, etc. I'm hopeful about how they will adjust. All I can do is try to be a good father for them and minimize their anxiety by keeping the discord away from them. I can't control how they turn out.
It's hard to tell if things will settle down eventually and become more amicable. I'm full of doubt. She was never one to compromise, negotiate, and work through difficult issues. I was a NG and I liked to please her, so I probably reinforced this behavior to some degree.
