Sounds like you are in general doing real good! But I Alps agree with Valeska here. It sounds as if no arguing in front of kids is one of your boundaries (as it should be). So just leave. Tell the kids you love them and turn around. Exchange kids at daycare, that makes it easier for everyone.
Me: 34 Stbxw: 30 D:5 D:3 Mini bd: May/June 2019 Married: Aug 2019 BD: 6th Dec 2019 OM Confirmed: Feb 2020 March 2020: I filed for D Waiting for D to be finalized and W to move out end of January 2021