I started to reason with him but quickly stopped when I realized what I was doing and ended with “do whatever you gotta do” and walked away.
Bravo! Every once in a while I think of all the times I wish I would have bowed out during my H's last spewing. I fully plan to stick to that in the future. It's so hard when the impulse is to just reason with them, isn't it?
Originally Posted by Kindly
It’s been pointed out many times on here...their actions speak louder than words cause the words are an ever changing jumbled mess.
I guess what I’m struggling with a little bit right now, is why do MLCers want something SOOOO bad (be it to move out, divorce, sell the house) and then do nothing to achieve those “wants”? I know some do leave right away, but for the ones that don’t I would think that “negative pressure” they feel would constantly be there regardless of what I’m doing or saying ....
I was just talking about this with IC and then posted a little about it when I realized I was echoing your exact question in asking why my H has wanted D so much and needs it to find happiness, but then never files. It really is mind-boggling. This limbo can't be pleasant for them either, but I wonder if it is partly that they are able to check out from it, disassociate from reality enough to stay in their "happy" place. Even if, from the outside, it's pretty clear that where they are is not a happy place. Your list says it all.
