Look if you want to play the "I hear what your saying" game with him that is your prerogative. I think Sandy sides where I am at and you don't validate WWs in open affairs because its a display of low value.
I don't validate my exw I treat her like a business partner. Yes, no, ok. I would rather play with rats then tell her " I hear you" when she said something to me but you are not there yet. You'll get there at some point.
