Quote: But ten years from now, if you still feel that way, I think it's fair to say that you and I likely won't be married anymore.
Hairdog, I think you're on the right track, but I think your time frames are a cop-out. Why so long? These issues really don't take that long to work out if you're working on it. I'd say five months should really tell the tale, but I'd also (if I were you) expect positive results within five weeks. The two-choice dilemma (and standing up for yourself) means that you take a position based on self-integrity, and you will not accept anything less. You let her know that she has a choice to make, and that you will be making your own decisions based on the choice you see her making. It really doesn't take five years to get to that point. With such a long "deadline", she still has no real incentive to change - she'll just figure you'll forget all about it by then, or wimp out again. I know, it's scary to take a stand, but take it you must...
