Listen to the advice being given to you DJ. Really, really read it...more than once. And follow it. If you want to save your marriage, you need to do this. 100%. Yes we don’t know you or your W IRL BUT this is not about knowing the individual. This is human behaviour...plain and simple. We always want what we can’t have and devalue the things that we know we can have.
When I read your entry about your W’s text to you, my first thought is that she was experiencing a brief moment of loss of control when it comes to you. That was a temperature check. When you missed her text, she reacted, right? Then you apologized and told her that you missed it and you relieved her angst. Do not do that anymore! If she texts you something like that again, ignore it. Do not apologize. You are not at her beck and call.
Personally, I am not a fan of the non-acknowledged text as I think it can be perceived as game playing. But don’t give info like you are reporting to her or wanting her approval. She doesn’t have the right to that much information and you don’t need her approval or permission. And don’t tell her you are changing because words are cheap and they make you sound desperate... like please notice me!!! Sounds like she is noticing and not only that, other people in her circle are as well. Let them notice. You live your life for you.
Keep working at it. You will get there!!! (((HUGS)))
