Thanks for the further responses and a quick update from me.
I've got through to bedtime on Monday. I've not heard from my wife and don't expect it anytime soon, she will take what I said on Saturday about it being over for me and to only contact me again about my daughter, when she went out again withe other person. I realise I need to be careful with these loose statements.
I haven't contacted her but possibly made a small.mistake earlier. I work in a town centre location and my daughter / wife went to the town today. I've been doing interviews all day and had to rush to the town to get a drink. I contacted my daughter and asked her to pop over to where I was to say hello. The mistake us that I walked her back to where her mum was having coffee. I felt quite good as I'd dropped another trouser size and had had to dress up. My wife made a comment about how slim I was looking. I just said hello and asked her how she was. She said she was okay, alright, although not in the most positive of tones. I just said okay and goodbye and strutted off with various emotions (not that she would tell). Probably a mistake but I'll hold my hand up there. My first thought was shouldn't you be really happy now that you have a new relationship on the go.
Just on the GAL point, I still have things to do but should add since 2015 I took up running and reduced weight by just under 5 stone over the 5 years. I'm running or cycling up to 5 times a week to help my physical / mental health. I also took a job which has required me to travel across Europe and forced me to address my travel phobia. I look back on my life 5 years ago and will be the first to admit I was boring. I never want to go back there in any capacity. I still have more to do. My wife has previously said she recognises some of the changes.
I understand detaching is more for me and is preparation for my wife never returning. My concern is that is does become self-fulfilling. If I don't contact her, does this create a void for others to fill and has she can be quite stubborn will she avoid contacting me even if she wants to? Appreciate early days but when someone else is pursuing, the temptation is to respond. I'm a little anxious for tomorrow as my daughter is staying at friends freeing my wife up who is not in work this week. Fear is she will disappear out for the night, I'll resist checking and try and switch off from the thoughts as nothing I can control.
Daughter has just rung me as she stresses about her mum drinking wine. She says mum has had 3 glasses. Daughter over elaborates to be honest, so I've told her to calm down and she is fine with her mum, do I won't get involved. Mildly interesting that she is having a drink on Monday night when she is usually trying to manage her weight, I'm over thinking it that she might be a bit stressed based in earlier comments.
Anyway, this is all so very painful and with little sleep recently, I will try and get some now. Minimal sleep last night and kept waking up in pain thinking about her and others.
