not where I thought I would be

[AndrewP]

Chiming in here with some past history and perhaps TMI.

My ex didn't like sex and certainly didn't like being asked for it. So - weirdly - early in our marriage she told me that she would reliably put out on Sunday mornings IF I left her alone otherwise. Occasionally she would get in the mood on other days - usually if she wanted something. She said it put me in a more agreeable mood.

So that was the pattern for 26 years. Sunday mornings, if she was feeling up to it and if it wasn't anywhere around "that time of the month". I got really good at counting 28 days.

When we were empty nesters, we started going out for breakfast together every Sunday morning and then doing the groceries. I still remember being baffled when she would say that because there was no booty that she was sad that we wouldn't go out for breakfast. Excuse me?? Breakfast is my favorite meal booty or non.

Now while I have heard a lot of stories that it is now "normal" to expect sex for little investment, the idea of it being some sort of "pay back" has a long history in our society.

Makes me feel bad in some ways for the OM in my situation that he is stuck with those attitudes. But not very.

I've certainly found that no strings attached sex is a whole lot more fun and I no longer have to stare at the calendar.