... but it definitely is not what he wants from me.
You really don’t know what he wants from you. He doesn’t know what he truly wants, it changes all the time.
Mind reading is a problem-filled landscape. Accuracy in thought and heart helps, I found. Consider what H does and says, not what you think or interpret those to mean. Believe none of what they say and only half of what they do. (More or less )
When H says something, that’s all it is. He said something. It may be true at the time, it might (and probably will) change, he might be lying, or manipulating, or just trying to pick a fight, or whatever. Don’t make it more than it is.
He is confused and depressed. He will speak mostly in negatives and in absolutes - it’s just where he is right now.
Focus on you and continue moving forward.
Good decision to wait until H gets home. NC is a very good for healing.
You got this.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
)