What's my strongest urge?... to bury my head into the sand.

I have NO respect for him at this moment.... NONE.

Its still hard --- pulling the trigger on the D I don't want.

So I push him to get this done.... OR I just tell my L to serve him with D papers...

And, what happens if I choose to do nothing??? What happens if I just give myself more time and space... and I give him more time and space???

This is NOT easy. I'm angry and frustrated at so many things right now.