Consequences of Infidelity and Divorce

[rooskers]

Update

Ex has now resorted to trying to get me involved in a visitation battle again by saying D14 was ready to do overnights with her on her weekends knowing full well D14 didn't want that. I didn't take the bate by arguing with her about what D14 wants and instead just let her know that she was legally entitled to her full time with D14 from x-time until y-time and I fully supported that and would let D14 know. Visitation came and not only did she not take D14 for the full visitation but will now be cutting her visitation time with D14 from 3 days/2 overnights every other week to only one afternoon every other week. I am realizing the emails sent are just a way of trying to annoy me and really have nothing to do with wanting to spend time with D14. The more I don't respond to her emails or engage in drama the less she wants to do with D14.

~kml~

The reason I ask is because she IS your children's problem still. Borderline personality disorders swing between "You're the best thing ever" and "you're the worst person I ever met". It's so confusing and disorienting for people who are involved with them. They have trouble maintaining long-term relationships, friendships, sometimes jobs because of it.

This is why I have D14 in therapy and I continue to provide stability in her life. I have also fought and won to be the primary caretaker of D14 for 339 days of the year. I understand what you are saying but BPD, Bipolar, and all the other disorders are not treatable unless the person who has it is willing to get the help they need. My strategy has been to develop D14 into a mentally/emotionally strong individual who has resources and support to navigate the difficulties in life as opposed to trying to analyze and change my EX. It isn't what I wanted for D14. I appreciate you sharing with me kml and it must have been hard to watch your best friend go through that. I am glad your friend had someone like you to help navigate the struggles.

~DnJ~
Raising a teen by oneself isn't always the most pleasant experience especially during this COVID nightmare but I wouldn't trade it for the world.