Spent part of last weekend working on our financial statement. H texted last week if I had heard from my atty and then requested to see what I had so far. I emailed it late Sunday night (H works nights).
He texted early the next morning but I was asleep. 30min later he called. I was in bed and had a huge dialogue in my head of answer... don't answer... and i went with the former.
I answered "hello" and he curtly said "YES"... in my head I'm thinking DUDE you called me don't act annoyed with me... instead took the high road and just made a point of saying "hello" again... he responded better in kind.
He started off by asking did I have the numbers for one of the vehicles reversed. I said I did not but I was also surprised that we were so underwater on that vehicle. I went on to say that that would be on me as I was the one pushing for this vehicle - probably didn't look into it as much I should have *** this is a big deal because when it came to his truck we both looked online... then I picked out 3 that fit our budget and seemed to be a good deal and let him go alone to test drive and buy the one he wanted. That seemed to result in resentment over a few years that showed him I was controlling. *** So, I wanted to take responsibility that I picked out this car but he and I went to test drive and we left with the car. BONUS is ---- he wouldn't let me take the fall. He started saying it wasn't my fault and the car should have held its value and that the used car market is flooded right now. WOW... wasn't expecting that response.
He then asked about where I got his monthly salary from and I stated from his W2's last year and did the same with mine (we both make a base salary but constantly double that yearly. He stated he is not making anywhere near that this year and I agreed but stated this financial statement is not based on our current life but life before he left. He seemed to accept that.
Here is where I tried to say - well, is that all you needed?... hey, I need to get to work.... but he went right on to ask about our timeshare and I told him I still needed to make a phone call and if I got a lunch break today I would try calling them and forward the information.
Somehow we are still talking and for some reason I asked if he had spoken to his daughter recently. He said no... hasn't seen or spoken to her but that he had seen his son yesterday. I just asked how he was - he responded he was good and then my H stated something about a sugar rush yesterday. That confused me so I asked to clarify "sugar rush"? He then went on to state he had too many deserts at his family reunion yesterday... I just said "oh". He went on to talk about some decisions his son was making and I just listened. Only asked questions if it seemed appropriate to what he was talking.
I mentioned that S19 and his cousin would be living in the same dorm. H started asking all kinds of questions about my nephew in regards to his major, etc. Discussed that the kids had to take a COVID test, etc. Then H started talking about the requirements of the university in my town.... I just listened... why would H know of the requirements for this university??? Because OW's daughter goes there and he made sure to put on the Google calendar he is helping her move in... BUT, I kept quiet and just listened.
I could tell he was home and could hear our puppy... so I asked how the dog was doing. He updated me with general "he's good" and the latest kennel issues. I let him know I spoke to the breeder last week and got updates on his litter mates as one of the females is a phenomenal dock diver and is already doing 16ft jumps which is not typical of a dog under a year of age... Seemed consistent with the strength this puppy is showing... H seemed to check on that...
I knew I should have ended the call for a second time but H beat me too it stating "hey gotta go walk the dog"... so I said "yeah I've got to get to work".
It was over a 40min call....
CRAP.... what am I doing???
I hate this. I hate him.
This is 100% on me. He is being extremely chatty but not one question about me... even "how's work" or even about the kid he helped raise for 10yr... NOTHING. WHY? Because he doesn't care. He is checked out. He only contacted because he thought I was over representing his income on legal forms....
I'm having lunch with my SS20 tomorrow. I was hoping to see SD19 but she is pretty much a recluse these days. S19 is leaving for college soon and I know he would like to see them both. Of course the one person that won't be mentioned during the entire visit will be my H. I just miss my family.
Focusing on getting things prepped for college for S19. Nearly done in the attic. Trying my best to keep trudging forward and to stop this backward movement.
