Ending Limbo

[LH19]

As usual with my posts, events have me spinning a bit. W was served a couple days ago. She chatted with me a couple times since. Asking me what to do, what I want. Blaming me for filing and not discussing it. Says she was still figuiring out what she wanted to do. She had a few blatant lies in the discussions. What has me confused though is how normal she is acting. Like not angry, not sad. Totally stable. Thats a good thing dont get me wrong. Im surprised to see it.

This is a standard behavior for WWs. They will not show you emotion.

Im surprised she had no plan for Ding yet. None. Not sure what she did the past few months. Im also shocked that someone can be discussing the end of an M with little to no emotion.

See above

I realise a part of me was hoping she'd at least be upset. Ive seen myself as valuable so the easy discards affecting me a bit.

You didn't get the reaction you wanted. Very predictable

Also this makes me seem like the crazier unstable one.

Core I am sorry but you are the more emotionally unstable one.

Such as, how am I the only one upset, how does she have no guilt, if shes this stable while talking D, then surely the problem is me.

She just has a better handle on her emotions than you. If you remember I encouraged you to give it time until you were emotionally stronger.

I wonder how much W was making up during the chats and what was manipulating. She's talking sense in the discussions or it seems that way.

Mindreading. Waster of time.

Its so much more real now. Back when they served her, it felt official. As I've mostly been checked out since March it should be easier but her seeming so normal and stable has me feeling guilty.

I am confused as to why that makes you feel guilty. Sounds to me like you are heading for a pretty amicable D in which you both want.

Hoping you all have some 2x4s or something to club me with. I was 100% sure when I filed, I know shes not good for me, I know I'll be just fine yet my workouts are lacking, anxiety is seeping in a bit more and a few conversations have me doubting what I did was right. Just awful facing the last few days.

Again, seem to me that it went about as good as one could hope. I must be missing something.

I'm sure on the decision here to D. I didn't D for a reaction but rather to get me and the kids to a more stable environment. I reached my limit of neglect, criticism, control and see myself as valuable enough to move away from that.

Ok. Great! Then move forward with an amicable D and move on with you life.

I see I'm still hoping for a real apology....sorry its come to this, sorry I drove you to file, sorry for hurting you, its my fault for such and such. How does one plan to be amicable and coparent without ever cleaning up the damage they did.

Are you going to apologize for your role in this situation? Why can't you coparent amicably? Again I am really confused. You want a D and she wants a D. That should set up perfectly to coparent.