It’s normal to cycle through these emotions and wonder if our MLCer was ever who they were. It’s normal to question our marriage, to ensure we see with clarity. You are questioning H’s inner self, when even he doesn’t know right now.
But how do you know? How does one believe?
Originally Posted by cardinal
I wish there was a reset button to get me back on track.
Ask yourself this:
Was I happy in my marriage?
Overall. Don’t focus on a couple of bad incidences, over the 10 years of marriage, over the 16 years together. Look overall.
I would say your answer would be yes.
Own you part of the SSM, not all - H has a part in that too. And learn from it. No one is perfect and everyday we have the opportunity to gain. Become better not bitter.
And realize you were happy. You lived a happy life. Don’t unwittingly rewrite to suit H’s spew.
I was happily married. XW and I were together 30+ years. She was happy too. Then her buried past came calling.
You are challenging your memory and belief of the past. 16 years doesn’t just happen. I know it feels different right now for you. Believe me, I know. Emotions are fleeting.
Was I happy?
Believe it.
Will I be happy again? YES!
Believe it.
And Happy Birthday cardinal.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
