You are getting awesome advice from some very wise gals.
Originally Posted by cardinal
...yet I still walked into pointless convo with H!
We’ve all done that.
We all try taking sense into our now internally unrecognizable spouse. It’s ok. Don’t beat yourself up. And don’t fret over it.
I will tell you something, those conversations aren’t pointless. You learn from them. You needed to have that conversation to ensure you tried everything. It’s just a step along the path. No big deal.
Originally Posted by cardinal
It feels like the deepest hatred and disrespect. Is this strange?
Not strange at all.
Our once loving spouse flips 180 degrees and becomes the opposite. And they get angrier and angrier at us. The venom they spew at us is bewildering.
The MLCer needs to disrespect us. Needs to see us as small, little, unworthy - it allows them to feed their fiction. Pay it no attention and utilize boundaries. You don’t deserve to be disrespected. You don’t allow it.
The poison and venom does get in - I know. It takes some time to transmute the poison. It will happen, stay better not bitter.
Compassionate indifference.
Your indifference towards H makes his attacks meaningless. He cannot emotional hurt you. Boundary his disrespectful behaviour and remain indifferent to his spewing. Keep the business side business and move you forward with compassion.
You got this.
D
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
