Separated but holding on for reconciliation (2)

[Pack_19]

hi Joe!

Perhaps I excuse myself too much but the overworking situation was something I got caught in, then couldn't escape. I won't go into details since my posts are long enough anyway, but it was like I was trapped in quicksand - something I couldn't get out of by myself, but only with help from outside it. A few people said the "no one lies on their deathbed wishing they'd spent more time in the office" thing to me, but that wasn't practical help. It was like someone picnicking beside the quicksand saying "When are you getting out so you can join us for sandwiches?"

Boy can I relate to this! Always thinking when I have THE better job, when I get THE great position, when I get out of rental I will have so much more time to enjoy my M and family . I was also told by some colleagues the only thing that matters at the end of the day was her and children. My ears where full or creap.

My W went interstate to visit her mother in January 2018. While she was away, the Lord said to me it was the eleventh hour, but that He was going to change things. Immediately my work situation changed and I was able to go home at a normal time. No more weekend work, no more long hours, after years and years of it. A week later my W returned and told me she wanted a D.

In my case it was short after I found that job, that great company that all of a sudden gave me the freedom to really balance job with family quality time. Before that I had a 1 hour commute which damaged a lot the status of things. Anyways, I think this a great lesson, there will never be better times. You need to make the better times HAPPEN. I am very sorry you had to live through this Joe, I do not know your W or your current situation but I want to encourage you to keep hope.

For a long time I have been thinking about making a post here about my perspectives and challenges on D and DB as a Christian, but I've been cautious knowing that this is not particularly a religious website and also knowing that even Christians have different interpretations about these things.

My vows are alive in my heart. This is not me living a fairy tale belief, it is what my heart is pushing me to do. I have made the mistake of mentioning to W (ouch me!) only to hear that "oh yeah! now you are a devote Christian" or "You ignored your vows for 5 years, do not judge me as if you had better values, my family values are WAY better than yours". I guess is something we need to carry internally. When I think about the PIES, in the spiritual sense I have determined to be more optimistic and cheerful and to develop a better R with God. I encourage you Joe to make a list of the things you want to improve spiritually. I review mine daily.

Hugs! Pack