So my WW called me about her mobile phone as its still in my name and she asked me to cancel it so that she could get her own contract in her own name, so thats all be done. We spoke for about 40 minutes calmly about various things like about our house (I am keeping it, paying for it and staying in it) and she was concerned about what would happen if I was to meet someone else what would happen to it etc. I told her the house is protected as we are not divorced and can't be for 2 years (in the UK) and we could decide what will happen should divorce be on the cards at this time.
I don't know it was a very strange calm talk as if we had both resigned ourselves to the fact that marriage was over. Which of course it is because shes said it is and is moving on with the OM.
We chatted about the future and she said she was going to look at some private rentals near her workplace, I asked her if she was going to live alone or if the OM was moving with her. I suspect that the OM is going with her but she said she hadn't thought that far ahead yes but as far as I know they are full steam ahead but of course I have no idea (not that it matters). I told her I was ready to work on our marriage but of course would not do that with the OM on the scene, I said to her at this stage I have some hope but I will not put my life on hold and I need to move forward for me and work on myself.
I told her that I really hope she has thought this through and that she wasn't making decisions based on her feelings right now for the OM but she of course started the blame shifting (albeit not as forcefully) saying it wasn't but that it was due to our finances and the fact I didn't spend much time with her (to an extent this is true as finances where a source of tension but we did have plenty of disposable income and I have always worked weird hours being self employed) and she said she had been unhappy for a couple of years and she knows she should have spoken up about it but then she just clicked with the OM (puke). I told her I want her to be happy and if that means its without me then that's her decision and so we should move forward with our separate lives.
Right now I just don't know how much of a WW is talking rather than this just being the natural end of a marriage (albeit she left with someone else waiting in the wings). At this point we have nothing else to discuss so there is no reason for us to be in touch now for quite some time. I guess this conversation left me deflated somewhat and that little light of hope has distinguished and isn't feeling as though it pulling me back now, its still there but it feels like more of a distant hope that if things are going to change its not going to be for sometime (perhaps if the relationship with the OM fails).
I remained calm and tried to show no emotion and tried to be a lighthouse should she be able to find her way back.
So as it stands I move forward as a single man and start doing things for me (bought a new bed, got some new paint for bedroom and I have re-arranged the furniture in the living room and taken down pictures of her, wedding ring is still on).
