There are problems however as she still works with OM and will not switch jobs (that left me a total insecure wreck).. Ultimately I feel with these things she is not really commited and the weight I feel I am carrying is too much and we end up in an argument and she leaves again (this time we lasted two weeks together). Of course after she has stormed off and we're over she said I did apply for a new job and she showed me on the phone and I ask her WHY did you not say this, didn't she realise this would have helped me feel that.. I have been telling her the last few weeks don't you realise I am NOT a mind reader and if you sit me down and talk to me about things..
Hi WMWB,
I'm sorry you're here and that your wife is back with her affair partner.
You can get through this. Many of us are rooting for you.
At the same time you go 180 in the other direction the way LH describes, I don't know if you realize this, but you blame your feelings on her: "THAT left me a total insecure wreck." and "THIS would have helped me feel that." You're putting it on her to manage your emotions. Then you blame your actions on your feelings: "The weight I feel I am carrying is too much and we ended up in an argument." You sound like a man out of control. It's time to own your feelings and actions so you don't get the way of your own success. It must be frustrating to learn she was taking the steps you wanted (changing jobs), but the "weight" you felt you were carrying was "too much" and you "ended up" arguing with her.
