Sorry you're here. My dog's name is Gigi so it's obviously the best name in the world so congrats on that!
The basics of your actions are:
1. Stop pursuing. 2. GAL (go out with friends, explore new (or old) hobbies, grow as a person. Your personality will dictate how this looks in detail. 3. Time and space.
Your husband had an emotional affair (EA) at a minimum and obviously you can't believe him on his timeline for when it became a physical affair either. From now on you should apply the DB saying "believe nothing he says and only half of what he does". He's lying, he's trying to make himself feel better, he's trying to justify everything to everyone - it's a bit of a whirlwind. But you have your own whilrwind to deal with. You have to detach from him. Drop the emotion and see things clearly. Take the bite off of your words, and more importantly off of his.
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There are many lies where he will tell me things about her and how great she is and how his family offered to meet her-that is not true! Is this normal for him to make the relationship more significant than it actually is?! Is he saying this to hurt me? He also doesnt consider that he cheated on me because technically they havent had sex until after he said we are done! So he laughed in my face when i said you cheated on me!
It is normal for him to pump up his affair. I wouldn't call it a relationship since he is married. He is trying to justify and feel better himself rather than hurt you. He is a pompous jerk for denying cheating, but I wouldn't bring it up again. It is what MWD calls a "cheeseless tunnel", meaning there is nothing down that path for you.
Go live your life and make your life great again. Seriously. Make it the best you can. Be a great woman, a great mother, a great friend, a great reader. Anything you want. Take advantage of this gift of time he has given you.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
