Haha, easier said than done, IW! I was trying to take things slow but my new man (and maybe hormones, being honest) have had other ideas. However, my new man has been quite awkward the last few days. There are some things about him which, lovely though he is, might be too big a stumbling block to us having a future. We will see. I'm actually ok about it ending or continuing, I just refuse to make my future happiness contingent upon a relationship ever again. So I asked him to back off for a bit, if he throws a tantrum and dumps me then that would be doing me a favour as I'm not sure I could be with someone too emotionally volatile. I had that with H! Part of me worries that new man has too much in common with younger H, even though many of those qualities are positive. I'm happy either way
I also have a really nice new friendship with one bloke I met on the dating app, we went for a walk yesterday and had a great time, we text each other most days too. It's really lovely to have a male friend with no complications. We discuss our relationships and get another perspective, that is great. Nothing sexual between us!
Yesterday H came over with the new puppy. It was heartbreaking to me to see him lavish the love on the dog which he was mostly incapable of lavishing on our family. Really, truly hurtful and I spent half the day in tears before he left. I was intending to broach the topic of D but I was just too emotional to do so. I told my lawyer I will do it when H comes to pick up ds2. On our 26th anniversary. Oh, the irony. Anyway, I feel more stable now. Emotionally bruised from yesterday and from new man being overly demanding, but getting back my balance. It'll all be ok, I know it. I have faith in myself and in my future capacity to look after myself and others.
