May, the custody arrangement you mentioned sounds... stressful. If you believe it will be a scorched earth kinda divorce, consider how seeing (X)H on a daily basis might make you feel. If your interactions with him are strained, as you suggest they will be, the kids could end up living in a constant state of tension around these frequent handovers. Being unable to have their evening routine at dad’s place might also interfere with their ability to feel comfortable in what will be their other home. I have to ask, would this be an attempt to keep OW from being involved in your kids’ lives? Trust me, I COMPLETELY understand wanting to have your little chicks safe in the nest every night. I also completely understand the feeling that H doesn’t deserve to recreate the lovely family life he chose to leave. I’m just wondering what the downside would be for the kids to spend three or so nights a week with their dad if he is the fantastic father you say he is? For instance, what are your objections to a 4-4-3-3 arrangement, or some other form of 50-50 custody? Curious what H’s thoughts are about not having any weekday evenings if you’ve already discussed this with him. This is by far the worst part of S/D and I just encourage you make sure your motivations align with your principles. I’m sure you are doing that already, but I’m interested in how you came up with this unusual arrangement.
