You are doing so well May. You really are. I wish I'd had taken things as slowly and carefully as you are doing right now. There will be grief, no matter what path forward you choose and no matter if your H chooses to take it with you or not. And I think grieving is another way of facing reality, and it's only when we do that, that we can make good choices. And you are on your way, even if the destination doesn't look that great or isn't clear at all yet.
