Second, when I say that I want to see her at least once a week, this is a part of the condition of me signing this agreement. This is my boundary. She has said that she needs this agreement in place in order to move forward; that is her position. My position is, I will sign this agreement only under terms that I feel are fair (see above), and after it is signed, my expectations are that we meet weekly to ascertain what is next, or else I am done. That's my position. .
Steve sounds more like manipulation to me then a boundary.
If she felt you were manipulative and controlling in the relationship I think I can see why.
I guess I don't understand. She's said that she needs this agreement in place in order to determine how we move forward. How is that possible unless we're actually getting together and working through things, having those tough conversations?
I don't want to live in the ambiguity and uncertainty anymore. Without this boundary, I'd potentially be signing up for even more ambiguity. Okay, we signed this agreement. Now what? More months of basically NC?
I'm having a really hard time squaring all of this up. NMMNG tells me I need to be clear about what I need, and hold the line on those things. Wisdom on here is to give her even more space than she asks for - which is exactly what I've done so far. Those two ideas seem in opposition.
I'm not trying to be difficult, I'm just trying to understand but I do very much appreciate everyone's candor.
