No changes on WAW - Pack_19 Part II

[sandi2]

Your life apart from the W seems to be developing well. That's good!

Not that I blame W but she has hurt me so badly with words that I give too much importance to every little thing she says, I need to get better there.

Do you want to know when you will get better? When you stop giving her the opportunity to talk. Paco, you have to shut her out, in order for you to build your self esteem. She is the destroyer of your self esteem. Each time she has a go at you, you suffer emotionally. Therefore, don't have conversations with her, and don't give her the chance to rage against you.

I genuinely expected a different course in those conversations, it seems all she cares about now is having her expenses covered. Again that is not a excuse to keep undergoing such conversations.

But why would you expect it to be different? Are you still doing things you believe will please her? The woman has issues, and nobody can fix them, except her. By expecting the next contact from her to be different, you set yourself up for disappointment. Sometimes, a person can DB as much as possible and it doesn't stop a divorce, and it doesn't change the other spouse. DB is not a guarantee that a marriage won't end. The other spouse has free will.

I have started an instagram account, my friends told me is a great way to socialize nowadays, let's see! So far I am posting about cars and fun moments with friends and I think that is all I want reflected there.

Good!

I saw one of W's best friends yesterday and she pretended not to see me and looked around for all the time I walked pass. This has happened before, I always think I would say hello, I have nothing against you, but W must have told friends I made her very unhappy (more crazy WAW talk!).

You can't trust her friends.

Sometimes I think it would her so much if W was with OP that I force myself to avoid seeing our M as over, I cant seem to make that pain go away from my chest. I truly think if I could let go of that pain and fear, I would do much better.

She has made references to how she is free to date others, so she may have her eyes on another man. If so, I pity him, b/c she has so much anger she'll carry it forward in another relationship. I really think she says those things to hurt you deeper.

Your M has been over for a long time. (((hugs))) You are hanging on to a corpse. Let go, so you can start to heal.

I know I am a bad DB but I will work on improving that, you deserve to see some good work on my side after all the time you have invested on my sitch.

We just want to see you happy. You don't have to DB for us. This is your life. It would be a giant step, if you can work on letting go of the M. Forget about trying to act a particular way with her. That only trips you up. Just work on dropping the rope, and stop having talks with her.