I am so sorry that he's blown the ship right out of the water. Everyone has given you excellent, and I mean excellent advice. It's going to be difficult, but you must continue as you have been w/respect to treating him "nicely". I'm not saying bend over backwards, but go on about your business as if it's just another day moving forward.
I highly recommend that you contact a lawyer and get some info about what you are entitled to and what you will need in the way of info for the separation of assets. I wouldn't rely on anything that he is saying at the moment because it will change if the boat is rocked. The best thing is to strike while the iron is hot and get everything written up and in place w/a lawyer and please, do not agree to go w/the same lawyer that he has. You need your own lawyer to protect you, not him.
Do not allow him to mess w/your mind and make you think that you can't live in your home. You need to find out what your state will allow you in the way of support. Talk to a lawyer about this.
Everything now has to be treated as a business deal whereby your partner has gone off the rails. Protect yourself at all costs because he is not one bit interested in giving you what you are rightfully entitled to. If he can figure out a way to just give you a little bit in the way of funds, he will attempt to do so. His empathy chip has completely shattered and you are the only sane/rational one in the mix.
Hang in there, stay strong and trust your instincts because right now, he's being nice, but that will change if he thinks you are questioning anything he tells you or you argue w/him.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
