He cannot even begin to compare buying "his" new place/house to your going on a trip to Mexico. I'm sorry, but I do not feel sorry for him if he has to tighten his belt a bit to make ends meet because he's walked away from his commitment to a marriage, wife, home and step son.
The only person you need to forgive is yourself. You've been beating yourself up for quite some time and now it's time to forgive yourself and stop thinking that the breakup is all your fault...it is not. He didn't put forth all that much effort to call a little meeting and sit down and talk to you about things. He waited until the time was right for him to leave and generally, the ow helps them to make that choice. If she was in the wings and helping him to build up the nerve to walk, then this was an exit affair.
Do not, and I repeat, do not take on all of the guilt of what happened. It's time to forgive yourself and turn this around...hold your head up high, back straight and repeat over and over again "I am a good person, I did not go out there and have affair on my spouse".
KC...you can do this and btw, please do not contact him...sit on the knowledge that you have about his calendar and let's see if he truly does have an attorney or if he's trying to manipulate you into doing something that your attorney has advised you not to do. Sometimes doing nothing is the best way to go.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
