That is so funny about things you've had together breaking. In January, that kept happening a lot to me. A chopstick broke that we bought on our honeymoon. A Christmas ornament someone had given us that had our names on it. At the time I told him it was a sign.... and he went and got the hot glue gun out and glued the ornament back together. Something else in the kitchen broke this week, and I looked at it, and of course those same thoughts went through my head. He saw me and said oh, let me guess, a sign?
Maybe it is also like when you're pregnant and you notice everyone else is. You're just keyed into this, your brain is searching for patterns and meaning and this pops in quite nicely. Maybe things have been breaking for years and before you never noticed it because it is just part of life.
On the OW... do you think this is where he's been living? I was skimming through your earlier posts on this thread and it has always seemed a little weird that he left all his clothes and stuff at your place, and never wanted to bring the kids over there.
On D-- where are you with the financial piece? I recall you saying earlier that you are better off not D-ed financially, at least for now.
On PA = D, or difficulty admitting what a POS your H is... i have been thinking about this and wondering if that same cognitive dissonance comes into play for us that the WAH is experiencing-- he has to believe that this is true love, or whatever, to justify his actions, plus his W is so terrible, you were never really in love, etc. Whereas I think that maybe something the LBWs are experiencing (and maybe this is a motherhood thing that dads just don't get in the same way) in that we are trained to always put our children first. So PA = D is not so simple anymore when you bring children into the mix, and they most likely will be better off in an R than a D situation. So in order to have this all make sense in our heads, we also have to believe that the M is salvagable, that your H is a flawed human being who has made some devastating mistakes rather than a selfish cheating narcissistic liar who has blown up your life and the lives of your children for his own selfish reasons. I'm not sure that this makes much sense... just is where my head is these days.
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
