I think it is the right move not to respond or engage on the text. And kudos for you, honestly, to take the kids to see their grandparents. You're a great mom. Parenting three children on your own through everything that is happening in the world PLUS the basketcase of your H is super-hero level $hit.
How are things going outside of parenting and ignoring H? How are you focusing on you?
(((wooba))) sending love!
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing