Non-consensual = rape. He raped you. I was able to se who’s emotional abuse easily. But it is physical abuse now. And before you tell me you consented, you didn’t just because you “pushed through it”
Please take the advice from this vet, and get out of there. You don’t need to eat -sh!t sandwiches. You need to save your life.
Non-consensual = rape. He raped you. I was able to se who’s emotional abuse easily. But it is physical abuse now. And before you tell me you consented, you didn’t just because you “pushed through it”
Please take the advice from this vet, and get out of there. You don’t need to eat -sh!t sandwiches. You need to save your life.
This is way beyond the scope of divorce busting, drinking STFU smoothies or eating sh!t sandwiches.
Physical abuse is never, never, NEVER okay. What he did is illegal and punishable by law.
Get out of there. There is nothing to work with here. Get yourself some counseling to work though it.
You did nothing wrong. But you need to get out of there.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
Okay, this is not what I need, really. I am already regretting it.
I don't want the flood gates open because then I will just have to leave the boards and I don't want that.
Ginger, have asked before if you could just skip my thread - we don't connect - your stirring the pot, with your back me up stuff and I just don't appreciate it.
For f sake, Job, just delete that posting.
M:50 H:49 D:16 S:13 M:23 T:25 BD: Feb 25th 2020 EA/PA: Dec 2019 - June 11, 2020 Behind every broken woman is a broken man...
I can’t skip on this post because this is serious. Very serious. And you may find me harsh, but I’m truthful. And I never want to see something so horrible happen to anyone, including you.
When you mention rape, this is going to happen. People are going to want to protect you.
I pray and hope you get the help you need and protect yourself. I don’t care how much you hate me.
You did NOT deserve that. You did NOT ask for it. I'm so sorry. You may not want to hear it but it IS abuse and it IS rape. Please do NOT blame yourself or think this is something you have to endure to get your husband back. His behaviour is absolutely horrendous. Please keep yourself safe and limit this man's access to your body and your mind. He IS dangerous and it WILL escalate. PLEASE listen to the objective opinions here.
You know the type of people that say " I am just telling the truth" --- a@@holes! So f'ing obnoxious that they hide behind that blanket statement. We ALL know people like that.
I for one, don't want your prayers - you don't know me - and I don't think for one second that you give a rats a@@ about me ..with your bless your heart routine. Go sell your crazy somewhere else.
I will make it explicitly clear to you (this is the third post I tell you Ginger)...GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE! YOUR EXACTLY THE REASON I SHOULDN'T HAVE POSTED!
What PROVES your insensitive is that you had to come back and post again.
M:50 H:49 D:16 S:13 M:23 T:25 BD: Feb 25th 2020 EA/PA: Dec 2019 - June 11, 2020 Behind every broken woman is a broken man...
Okay... if I could have edited my post...which I could not, but this is what it should have been:
Ginger, this is really sensitive territory for me, and (this is the third post I ask)...I would appreciate if you just skip my thread. I don't understand why you had to come back and post again. Your advice goes sideways for me.
It happened.. Things could have been way worse. I close that chapter with lesson learned. My H is an a@@hole that is pumped full of testosterone and I should have known better after that first experience. I made the choice to try again. He should not have acted like that. I know that. But I don't feel like I need to flee.
I am pretty raw emotionally, so please, just tread lightly, no more r posts. I just have my defenses up and probably over reacting - I know its all meant well - but some of the posts have made me pop a circuit breaker emotionally. I literally had to edit my original post which consisted of mostly f bombs.
Why did I post? So, I know LH is an awesome person (you are) and I know I was f'ing up - but I just wanted him to know - to just know there was more than me not trying. SO I posted - and I regret it. The shock is new to you all, but not to me - does that even make sense?
I appreciate this board and don't want to leave. What a mess I have made here. Now the focus is all on that incident. LH? Steve? (Spiral -if your still here?) help me climb out of this muck. Job.delete it. fix it. How can I even come back?
M:50 H:49 D:16 S:13 M:23 T:25 BD: Feb 25th 2020 EA/PA: Dec 2019 - June 11, 2020 Behind every broken woman is a broken man...
Oh my dear, I am very sorry you are so frustrated! Please do not leave us! We are here to help! I have been reading here a long time now and I have seen plenty of conflict arise. Myself included :-( It happens rather often actually! Our emotions are running high, we are vulnerable and we don’t all communicate the same way. We trigger one another very easily as we see ourselves in people’s posts. I don’t know your sitch but I will go back and read and see if I have anything new to offer.
I’m very sorry you are hurting! Deep breath... one at a time..... I think you can get through this and find support here! I know it!
Hugs! Blu
Last edited by BluWave; 06/25/2012:03 AM.
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
I am really sorry that this has happened to you and is quite concerning. Is it possible your husband is taking steroids? Did you communicate to him that you were not ok with what happened? I agree that what happened is bigger then what the board is equipped to handle and you should discuss this with a trained therapist in this area.
Again, I’m really sorry this happened to you and you should not ever feel unsafe while having sex with your husband.
