You seem like a very successful guy who does well in life. Why are you so obsessed with a woman who has fired as her husband, is on dating websites and didn't acknowledge your birthday?
You don't even have children together. I would really like to hear your answer.
BTW U is right you have NGS big time.
I wanted to come back to this, because specifically in the context of therapy, it's a question I've been asked. I mentioned to my therapist that right as she was getting ready to move out, WAS turned to me without context and said "You know, I don't think of this as a failure. I think of this as a success." And that really stuck out to me.
I do think of it as a failure. The most painful failure of my life. I've been lucky enough to have a lot of success in my life, and a lot of that success has simply boiled down to hard work, perseverance, and resilience. But when I look at the M, all I see are things I'd have done differently. Areas where I feel short, things I wish I knew then that I know now, times in which I took it all for granted. I'm hard on myself because that's what has always worked for me.
I don't know if I'll ever view it as anything but a failure. And it's probably true that the impulse I have to fix things, to make it right, to not forgive myself is keeping me in this loop.
