Thank you for the honest answers and I think it's great you working on the issues with a therapist.
Ultimately your fear of abandonment caused you to hold on too tight in your relationship which caused you to act desperate and needy which drove her away after 2.25 years. Just reaffirming your fears. ([censored] how that works) Then she goes out for a run and you just by chance run into her and then text her later to go out on a date. She starts to feel like you're suffocating her again so she backs off and doesn't respond.
Again, its best if you recognize the dynamic while your working on it in therapy and give her as much space as you possible can. She will not try to reconnect with you again until she feels that it is safe.
Thank you. Yes, I'm definitely working on exactly this in therapy. It's all interconnected, as you alluded: my fear of abandonment drove my NGS, which drove the lack of boundaries and the lack of trust, which became an impossible hurdle to overcome.
I'm frustrated with it, because it's been an issue all of my life, and it's just in such stark contrast to my professional life. When I read an article on high-value men, I recognize myself in all of them from a professional standpoint (driven, leader of men, etc.) but almost none of them personally. At least not yet!
The sad truth is that it's probably too late to ever convince WAS that I'm a different person now than I was in M -- and I really do believe that I am -- or that what we had can be repaired. Maybe in another life, I guess. But the work I'm doing will pay off down the road; I never, ever want to go through this level of heartbreak ever again.
