Yeah. I read back over my old threads (some of them) last night, trying to see if this was just a lock-down thing (he is working a lot, and it's difficult and traumatic work) or it was an 'us' thing. Charitably, the man is exhausted and getting next to no time to himself and that's extremely hard for him. It's also not an excuse for him reverting to behaviour that destroyed our marriage and tipped over the scale into abuse. So he doesn't get a pass. He could move out into hospital accommodation if he wanted peace and space and wasn't coping with family life. Reading back over my old threads, it's also just confirmed for me that for a while, there was more peace and we were making progress, but little to none of my emotional needs were being met, and while I thought that was because of my boundaries, it was actually because he can't be close to what he can't control, and I was getting really really resentful at having to button my lip in the face of his irrational behaviour. I feel pretty sorry for him today. He's blocked on my phone so he's sent me a couple of emails instead, which I have deleted unread (the subject line is enough to see that it is more ranting and not an emergency I need to respond to.) He's really suffering today, and what has caused this suffering is me respectfully pointing out he's being unreasonable, and refusing to toe the line when he says I'm not allowed to do it.
