Your son will be graduating HS and neither dads will be there. I think that speaks volumes but I am a very involved dad so maybe I am wrong.
Why did you send the Happy Father's Day text? Please be honest with me.
Well S18 dad just texted him last night that he will come. (I will not speculate why he first said he wouldn't come versus why he is coming now... not my circus... not my monkeys.)
But, again LH I caution you on making assumptions ---- which you have done not once but twice with this situation. I'm sure if you asked S18's father if he felt he was a very involved dad he would probably say YES, but IDK. There's a lot of dynamics at play in this situation and I gave up YEARS ago trying to understand. I just do me and let him do him.
Add in the fact that S18 dad lives in the state with the HIGHEST number of COVID deaths --- was that a factor in his decision??? Sad fact is I had friends who couldn't be there in the hospital for their family and funerals where no one could attend.
For the Father's Day text -- wasn't desperation. I would have been fine not sending it. WHY did I send???? For the reasons I outlined... He wished me Happy Birthday and Happy Mother's Day. If I feel I may not get over him NOT coming to the party for S18... then maybe he feels if I can't be cordial enough then that's the reason he doesn't come to the party???
So I just mirrored his regards --- AND, had no expectations. I didn't send some frilly meme or GIF. Just plain text just like he did AND just 3 words.
Had he not done the birthday or mother's day text I would have sent NOTHING.
