"Not the girl I married" would seem an understatement. I think the dopamine high has staged a coup d'état on her brain.
I had been having a better last few days. Then she called this morning to discuss some details of the D. She mentioned also that she was going to start renting out her home and move in with the OM, and then the plan is to buy a home together along the Long Island Sound before the end of the year. When I moved out on Mother's Day it was to give the two of us space, and of course deep down I was still holding on to a feeling of hope. I wish in my mind it had been more along the lines of letting her go.
As recently as February we were in Florida on vacation seemingly enjoying a nice vacation together as husband and wife. I remember conversing with a friendly Uber driver and my W digging her nails into my arm because she thought I was flirting with her, which I was not. At the time I was put off by the jealousy, but now I look back at the moment almost with nostalgia as I would have to think there was at least some emotional investment on her part toward our marriage. February still seems recent to me.
Then in March she emotionally checks out, which I wasn't yet aware of. She gets real close to her band mate and then the EA turns into a PA pretty fast. The bomb drops on April 6th. I move out 5 weeks later on May 10th. And today she confirms that they're going to be buying a home together. This just seems all so fast. Is this typical of the MLC, or WAW, or WW mind set? I almost said why don't the two of you wait a year before making such a move so early on but that would have seemed self-serving and it's really not any of my business. She can do what she wants. The speed of all of this just seems crazy to me and it's hard for me to process everything that has happened over the last few months.
