C'est. the other thing the setting a date did for me was gave me something to look forward too. Limbo stinks. There is no question about it. When a WAS/WS has a LBS twisting in the wind, the minutes feel like hours, hours, like days, days like weeks. Once I set a date, I knew there was an end date to my limbo. That one way or another I would be moving forward and not be stuck. It was one of the best things I did in my sitch.

And I actually started looking forward to it! If she didn't reommit to the MR and help me create MR 2.0 with her, I was going to be free. It actually was exciting. It took a lot of the dread out of the impending end of my marriage.

The other thing I did that was really freeing was to get a consult with a lawyer. Once all of the unknowns started to become knowns I started to feel empowered in my sitch.

I honestly think the changes these two actions endeared in me, where I really started to let go, was sensed by my WW and started to make her question what she was doing and losing. One reason it worked was because I was genuinely starting to move on. Not faking it to engender a change in her, but I actually started looking forward to a new life on my own, what that looked like, and the possibilities that opened up for me.

M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018