Cest_Moi, your feeling on "I don't know what to do. I want the marriage, but I also don't feel like I deserve to be strung along like this." is completely legitimate and common too. Some of the best advice I got in my sitch was to set a date. If my W wasn't committed back to the marriage by that date then I would go file for D myself.
The suggestion was one year post BD.
That's a great idea! Looks like my poop or get off the pot date is going to be Jan 5th.
I pissed him off today. We have separated the finances, for the most part, each have our own accounts and he would send me money for half the groceries, half the mortgage, half our loan and half the insurance. Mortgage and loan are not an issue - he sends it every payday. Groceries I usually remind him on payday of what his half is, insurance when it comes out. Two weeks ago he was talking about having money tied up from work travel and I said that I could hold off on the groceries so he wasn't short. He said he was still good, but didn't offer anything. So this payday, I reminded him of the groceries from the last month, plus the insurance. I offered to deduct money he spent on our kids and household stuff, I just didn't know how much he had spent.
He got extremely pissed off at me over email about it and how he won't take that off cause he's not nickle and diming me and doesn't keep track of everything he spends.
This got me pissed off because those are the only things he pays for the house. I take care of the other bills (I know I shouldn't but it's helped me see that I can do this on my own and will be ok). I buy all the kids clothes, shoes etc. I don't count every penny.
So now what was a peaceful environment is now the silent treatment from him. I'm actually anxious to go grocery shopping this weekend.
