Congrats on the job, that's great! Wailing doormat made me laugh! Speaking of laughter, is there any in your M? Can you put some in your M? Your M just seems so serious and you are not a serious person. Yes, being vulnerable is hard and scary (I'm realising this myself, and how little of myself I gave to my H) but perhaps the main way through is through humour instead of difficult R talks. Just a suggestion. Wanting domestic security and not to be Ded are no small motives, Alison. Not reason enough to stay married, but still powerful motives which you can build on maybe?
Not sure what I'm saying here, but you have to let down your walls little by little if your M has a chance of surviving. And he needs to do the same, I'm not sure if you think he's capable of that, but at least give him the chance instead of assuming the worst. And maybe with a little joke or two x
