As a side note, I said to him the other day, why are you OK with AP telling you she doesn't ever want to speak with you again if you choose the M because it will be too painful for her, but it isn't OK for me to say the same thing-- with the added bonus of I actually DO need to see you, and potentially with her, forever since we are bound by these children? At first he said, oh, interesting. I hadn't thought of it like that. Then he said, (straight faced) every time she talks to me she falls back in love with me. I don't think that is the case for you. (no, it is not.) And finally he said, I argue with her about that too. I don't understand why if you love someone you would want to cut them out of your lives. He's doing this to her too. Delusional and wrong. He just re-set the hook with her. I need to drop the line on my side.
I dont know if this is particularly relevant, but AP's comments "IF you choose the M.." - did he not already convey to her back in Feb that he DID choose the M? Why has she come back giving him an ultimatum now, knowing that he had already made his choice? I know he wasnt ready to provide details to you of how it ended in Feb, and I'm wondering how it ended and what was said (as I'm sure you have many times). Sorry May if this isnt helpful or relevant right now, but did he give her the same "can you give me 6 months to work on my M and if it doesnt you'll be there for me" type thing?
M:49 H:49 T:20 M:18 D:16 D:14
EA: Feb 2019-May 2020 Separated: Mar-early Aug 2020 H asked to reconcile: Jun 2020 EA relapse: Oct/Nov 2020 Recon #2: since Nov 2020
