That is really great news about work! I am going to guess that knowing you are in a place where some of the factors that may have held might open you up to feeling freer to consider implementing some changes in your R when the time is right. And, you have a right to feel those feelings of mistrust and betrayal and fear-- you came by them honestly. I think it is important to keep examining them, though, in the context of what is happening *now*, and be open to considering that perhaps some have served their purpose and can be freed.
xoxo
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing