Scout-- I am positive he got hooked back into OW because she decided to text him to say she's moving on, oh and by the way slept with someone etc. it was all such an obvious ploy. But not to worry, H got her hooked right back up as plan A. I almost feel sorry for her. I mean everything else aside-- he's been in a relationship with her for two and a half years, she's thrown ultimatums right and left, still hasn't gotten what she wants, and is now saying she'll give up having children in order to be with him, since he adamantly does not want more.
My point with that PS remark was that H knows you are still available because you’ve yet to enforce any consequences for his behaviour. I don’t think he truly believes that you’ll ever file for divorce. And that’s why he continues to push and push and push the limits and string you along and refuse to make a decision. Because you’ve shown him that you’ll wait indefinitely for him to choose you.
If he leaves, you’re done - that’s a great boundary. Forgive me if you’ve already answered this, but if he won’t move out, won’t file for divorce, and continues his affair - which is what he’s done so far without any consequences - what’s your plan?
