How do I manage this? Just stop engaging in those conversations? Start really planning for what I need to do next assuming he gets the courage to walk out the door without my explicit blessing and promise we'll stay friends? I need help, guys. This is really hard right now.
Hi May,
((Hugs)) Since you're not willing to be in an open marriage with him, yes I'd stop having conversations about it, and yes I'd start moving a.s.a.p. towards the exit. Make him confront reality NOW of losing the benefits of a full-time family life with a partner who stood by him through so much, for a long-distance fantasy EA where their goals are different. He may give it up. He may dive head-first into it *now* when the timing is off, instead of 6-12 months from now when the timing is perfect. It ends the limbo for you. It lets you move forward sooner either way. My thoughts from the outside looking in with no skin in the game. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I wish he saw clearly what the up-to-now luck man is about to lose.
