I think that he probably wants me pining for him despite the fact that he has moved on. He made several patronizing remarks to me today that made me feel that way. “I hope you’ll still be able to have a nice day today” and “I want to start to prepare you for things that will be hard for you”. It’s insulting and it’s always seemed like he likes picturing me crying over him.
Hope, USE THIS! That f-you feeling you get when he says crap like that? Use it to fuel your attitude towards him. It may be a fake-it-til-you-make-it type of situation, but reading that infuriated me and I soooooooo want to picture you looking at him all cool and calm and gorgeous with one eyebrow raised, like PLEASE. GTF over yourself, dude.
On the child and OW thing... I feel you so much. It scares me now crazy I feel even thinking about it. I totally get exactly how you feel. The one thing I would say is, if you haven't already, maybe read some of Scout's posts from a month or so ago, when her S started chirping about the OW changing his diapers and such. I was overwhelmed just reading it but was brought back to earth by the amazing way that Scout handled it. If I can take my emotions out of it, another kind and loving adult in your child's life isn't a bad thing (assuming the OW is these things). And you will never, ever be replaced as her mom. Never.
HUGS.
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
