Met with W in an effort to make mediation session next week more productive. I arrived after her, and was somewhat surprised that she had a coffee for me. Discussed the need to tell the kids about her decision to D before D papers are filed and prior to next mediation session, about which she is very nervous. I validated how I could see how she felt that way and also made it clear that it was her responsibility to let them know her decision, even though we would be there addressing the kids at the same time.
She is starting to realize the financial implications of her decision. I did my best to validate her feelings. 'I know this is a difficult time for you' 'It sounds like you are feeling really anxious.' She is still iffy about where she will live (not saying I believe her, just replaying conversation for folks here), and is unsure of where she will work, etc. Agreed that house will be sold and we will split any equity. Also discussed briefly how we'd like to divvy up the marital debts.
Lasted about 45 minutes, at which point I summarized the conversation to her and ended the discussion.I was better than usual with eye contact and nodding when she spoke etc. When it ended, she asked if she could get anything for the boys at WalMart (I usually shop for the household on Fridays), and I said, "No, thank you. I'm heading there after I make a few other stops." As we were walking to the car she said, "Maybe I'll see you there." After which we went our separate ways.
