The dilemma you face in one we all had to face. The fact that it takes two to make a marriage, and only one to end a marriage. So you do not get the final say on whether or not the D will be "settled", she does. Protecting yourself, making sure the D settlement is fair and equitable, doesn't mean you are okay with the D, or think it is the right move. It is a recognition that without two committed spouses willing to work on the MR, there is no MR. I see LBWs struggle with this more than LBHs, but can you really claim what you have at the moment is a marriage?
So at some point you have to ask, what are you trying to save? All you can do is protect yourself, and hope and wait she comes to her senses. But if she wants the D, then she is going to get the D. And not protecting yourself to make sure you don't get completely screwed in the D is not going to stop that.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
