Still married couple from Scandinavia Part 2

[SteveLW]

Hi Steve,

My GAL couldn't be better, or as good as it can with the restrictions in place. So basically all I can do except for traveling which used to be a big part of my life. My 180s, I haven't thought about in a long time but I feel I got there a long time ago. I quickly made changes that stuck with me now more than a year later.

I am going to challenge this. We can all improve. Constant self-improvement is the one thing I learned in my sitch. To never stop growing, learning, working, becoming better.

Lawyers aren't needed here as we had a solid prenup and all I have to do is put the envelope in a mailbox and the D is final. I have until mid October to do that before the divorce is off and we would have to file again.

Then set a date. "Unless she is committed to working on us by Sept. 15th (or whatever you choose) I will drop this in the mail that day."

You are floundering because you have no end goal here. Thus you start to deviate from DBing and get the urge to discuss "us". That is a violation of DB rules.

I get the whole when she wants to get back together vs when she doesn't and I'll be confused but the thing is I'm not confused. I'm in between two likely scenarios If I was to bet money on this, the signs I see from her all point to her wanting to get back together. But I highly doubt that she would ever reach out and beg to come back, even if that is what she really felt. She is and always have been scared of putting her self out there. When we first met, I was the one who had to take that step for example, otherwise we would not have been a couple.

Yep, and where did that end you up? Right into D court. Do not repeat the mistakes of the past. I learned another thing in my last few years of life. When I was younger I had women that were unabashed in their interest and desire in me. For some reason I always was pushed away by that. I had to have someone I WAS CRAZY for. That was my goal. Wasted the better part of 2 decades on one woman that strung me along. And then met my W. Similar beginning for me and my W. I was crazy about her, she strung me along for 3-4 months and then finally relented and an R began. Yet I've had 2 sitches in our 21+ years. I look back and realize that the important thing was finding someone that was CRAZY about me. That was willing to move mountains to be with me! I looked for the wrong things an suffered.

Make her work to get you back. If she doesn't, shake the dust of your feet and move on to greener pasture.

I'm not saying that means I should chase her now, but I don't agree she would retreat if I was to bring "us" up. She already knows it's a conversation waiting to happen, it's in the air when we meet.

Mind reading. You do not know this. What is in the air is the desire for you to end this limbo you are feeling and break a very basic DB rule. Many have traveled that road before.....and have lived to regret. A couple that have posted on this forum again after a longtime in the last few weeks.

Whatever, you decide, good luck! I am pulling for you.